Flirting with French--An early review

Early review copy --
I found this book to be delightful and fun to read. The narrator was a simple man in his 50's trying his best to learn French. He not only wants to learn the language; he wants to be French. Throughout the book I learned more than just French words I learned about the origins of language itself. I found the history to be very informative and at the same time humorous. Mr. Alexander lets us peek into his bumbling adventures and to forgive his errors. Throughout these adventures in learning a new language there is also some health problems Mr. Alexander has to deal with at the same time. You can't help but to fall in love and root for the underdog in this story. It is an inspiration to adults who are trying to learn something new, the feelings of inadequacy, and the powers of the human mind. As a creative non-fiction this story can deliver an enduring touch to passions we hold dear and to go ahead and try new things, despite our age or abilities.

No officer, I SWEAR it's oregano!!

The north winds are blowing and the trees are turning beautiful shades of yellow, gold, and red. It is a beautiful time of year here in the Midwest. Yet we all know what's right around the corner. It's that wonderful 4 letter S word that makes you cover your ears and deny you ever heard it- SNOW!

Last year was a killer. Not only was it one of the coldest winters ever we made new vocabulary words to describe our frozen tundra. Words such as, Blizznado, Snowpocolypse, and Polar Vortex. While these sound like awesome names for metal bands they are forces of nature that makes us re-evaluate the adaptability of humans in adverse conditions. 

While this season is still a few weeks off it is time to hunker down and prepare. Since the garden here is mostly torn down I have a small project left, the herbs. I planted the obligatory basil and oregano. These are hearty and resiliant herbs that can be added to any Italian dish and work with many other soups and stews. 

During a late morning after the dew has risen off of the plants I harvested my herbs. Now both of these wonderful aromatics need to be treated differently. Basil is a broad leaf moisture rich herb. It can be tricky with this one. You could hang it but you would need to keep the bunches small and well ventilated to prevent any moisture from accumulating. This would cause molding and then you may as well have just bought a store brand.

On the other hand, oregano is a small leaf hearty herb that can taste better dried than fresh. It doesn't hold as much moisture and can be easily dried. Most sources say you can hang dry or lay flat wait and let it be. I am slightly impatient and decided to look for other ways to dry the oregano and came across a comment that mentioned drying it in your car. I thought, what the heck I've always wondered what a pizza delivery driver's car might be like. I set the sprigs out on a paper bag and placed them in the back window of the car to dry. 

 It was almost perfect except you probably didn't want to drive around town. I realized they were in my back window before I left for the library so I transfered them over to my husband's car for the time being. When I came home I saw his car was missing, oh crap! I called him and found out he went to visit his friends at the lake and would be home soon. I reminded him of the new passenger he was now chauferring and he told me not to worry--so I didn't. 

When he arrived home later he was complaing about getting cut off by another driver and that he had to slam on the breaks to prevent an accident. When he slammed on the brakes the oregano flew to the front of the car and shot wildly around like confetti on New Year's. I giggled thinking of the old saying, "But officer--It really is oregano!"

Being the great guy he is, he picked up as many sprigs as he could and placed them nicely back on the paper bag. I admit there are considerably less leaves than I originally put on there, but oh well. I still made out well and have enough to last for at least a few meals.

Ball jars now sells these nifty little herb jars and they have built-in shakers. I bought some to hold the dried herbs in and they look great! At least this year they look like real spices, not dried leaves in baggies like last year. Imagine the excuses that go along with transporting those little buggers.

Hot Toddy to the rescue!

Well, my last post was just a highlight of what happens when you were working too hard taking care of everyone else that you forgot yourself. This self-sacrifice is well known in "Mom/Dad Land", because it's not just moms who get overwhelmed. We have to give props to the Dads out there too! This post will be simple and to the point. Wisconsinites LOVE brandy. It can help a teething baby by rubbing it on the gums. This is typically the blackberry sorts. It can be a sophisticated cocktail before, during, and after dinner. It can be used to make wonderful additions to cherries and pears for desserts. And most importantly, to relieve the symptoms of a cold/flu.

This my friends is what is referred to as a "Hot Toddy". I'm not sure who Toddy is, but I'm thankful for his contributions to sick people everywhere. Here's the low down. It is a hot drink that is made up of tea, honey, lemon, and of course brandy. It can be dressed up or down depending on what you have on hand. I have read that you can buy apple flavored brandy, this sounds wonderful and I may have to do some personal research on this one! My version this week was an orange spice tea, a nice spoonful of clover honey, a drip or two of lemon juice, and a shot (maybe a little more) of brandy. serve hot and steamy with a fuzzy blanket and a soon to follow nap. I have found that even if it doesn't totally relieve the symptoms of a runny nose, stuffy head, all over ache it at least makes it a little easier to sleep.

So while I nurse this silly sickness I will leave you with a picture of Wisconsin love-- The Hot Toddy!

Working for a sick day

Now that school is here our whole family is feeling a little under the weather. I have been hitting the books and the kids are hitting each other. Strike that, those aren't my kids. Anywho, it is well known that when you smash a group of random people together you are bound to share some germs. In our case we have one in middle school, one in high school, a husband who just returned from Paris, and me in college. How many more germs can we mix into this pot before we need a new category on the taxonomy chart?

My solution is an old tested method of chicken noodle soup. It has been shown to be effective in producing mucus, soothing throats, and making life easier for moms everywhere. Like many others, I make WAY too much soup and I end up with copious amounts of leftovers. This is good and bad. It's nice to be able to grab a bowl and microwave it up the next day, but if it is still left in the refrigerator after two weeks it may grow a little green and begin reciting Shakespeare. 

Tonight I made my home made chicken noodle soup with a cheat. I bought a precooked rotisserie chicken at the store and a loaf of french bread. I brought out the big army pot and proceeded to pick a fight with this bird. Piece by piece I reduced it to a skeleton while munching on tidbits and a few crispy skins. I know it's not healthy, but I cannot refuse temptations. Then I filled the pot with 4 cut up carrots, 1 medium chopped onion (tears included), 2 stalks of celery, and a few bouillon cubes. I let that simmer on the stove at the lowest setting for about 2 hours. By this time the house is smelling great and palettes are prepping. Add a dash of garlic powder and salt/pepper according to taste. I use this awesome stuff called Jane's Crazy Mixed-Up Salt. It is a mix of salt and spices and got hooked on it.

Finish it off by pouring egg noodles in about 15 mins before serving and add a bit more water for the noodles to soak up, trust me they're greedy. By putting the noodles straight into the soup they take on the chicken flavor and create a harmony unmatched by Campbell's. Now if I were you I would set this soup off to the side for a good 20 minutes because the wrath of Hades is contained within the heat of this pot. Spoon into bowls and serve with bread or crackers.

After eating and having our fill we were still left with almost a gallon of soup! Now not to upset Shakespeare but there is no way we were going to eat all of this in less than 3 days. I have all of these super awesome containers that Chinese restaurants use for carry out, so I ladled soup into each one of them leaving about an inch of room from the top and covered them. I like to stick them into the freezer for up to 3 months so we can use them at a later time. This is especially good for those days you want a good meal, but you can't make one because you are too tired or sick to move. A bonus is when you can bribe a kid to stick it in a pot and stir it for you while you lie on the couch contemplating how to call in sick to life. 

Even though I am not sick today I know the weather will change and we will need to defeat a new strain of kangaroo-chicken-sushi flu #32 and I will be prepared--And so should you!

Apple Butter a Fight to the Finish

After hanging out in this wonderful rain we are having, a few friends and I were talking about my recent Facebook posts. I have been canning for most of the summer and decided to take on the challenge of apple butter again. My first attempt at this was 3 years ago. I tried to make apple butter it turned out more like spiced apple sauce. It just didn't have that smooth spreadable consistency that is required. So I put it in the pantry and let it sit. My children were very nice about it. Every couple of weeks they would take a spoonful and eat it from the jar in the refrigerator. They would remark on how good it was and I would roll my eyes and silently wish it was "real apple butter".

The first time experience was horrible. Imagine cooking apples in a saucepan until they were soft. Then smashing them down with an old potato masher and adding copious amounts of sugar. Then trying to stir frantically so it doesn't burn to the pot. All the while it is sputtering sending little balls of fire at my hands that stick and begin burning the skin. I even went as far as to try to protect my hands while stirring by putting on those cheap little .99 stretchy gloves you use for winter. That was a huge mistake! The bubbling mixture was spitting at the gloves and adhering its hellish heat on my fingers. I finally gave up and thrust my hands under the cold sink water, gloves still on mind you, and found some relief. After that I just put the stuff in jars and processed it according to the recipe. Thus ending up in my pantry where one still lives today.

After debating if I wanted to relive the sweet gooey hell I endured 3 years ago I decided to take a more informed approach. Scouring the web and several different books I saw my error. I should have made applesauce first and then cooked it down--for a LONG time. I found a few sites that offered a simple laid back approach with a crock-pot. This was tremendously less dangerous than my first encounter battling a 212 degree pot with something to prove. First off I bought the apples from the local farmer's market and washed them. No peeling, just cored them and tossed them in a large pot of boiling water for about 3 minutes until they began to get soft. Here comes the fun part, I suggest you find a small child who doesn't understand labor laws to help you out. I brought out my chinois and bit by bit smashed them through the itty bitty little holes.

There are many modern tools you could use to help this along such as a food mill or a fancy-schmancy Kitchen Aid with super cool attachments. Yeah I'm asking for one for Christmas, this will be year 3 on my list...hint hint to my wonderful husband. After mashing all my agression away, I put all of the home made applesauce in the crock-pot and set it on high for the first hour and then switched it to low and let it sit over night. Now you have to remember to stir occasionally or the sides of your crock-pot will turn into a bumper boat crusted with sugar. Also you must leave the lid cock-eyed to let the steam escape. I went to bed and all night that yummy goodness was simmering down and making my house smell like a Yankee candle. After a total of 26 hours I was ready to put it into jars and process. Leave 1/4" headspace and water bathe the jars for 10 mins at 1,000 feet (check Ball canning for increased altitudes). Finally I took them out to cool and listen for the beautiful "ping" of music signaling the successful sealing of the jars. It was a long wait from start to finish especially when it smells like fresh baked apple pie in your house for a whole day, but totally worth it. This is the final product. 14 pounds of apples reduced to seven 1/2 pint jars.